Laptop Shack, Baby!

OK, you guys wanted it... here it is: Laptop Shack, Baby!

Wild Man John's birthday party

Yesterday I hosted a birthday party for Wild Man John. His friends Eva and Clarisse both attended. We ate massive amounts of tacos, talked about world events and toasted to the Wild Man's big day.
But we don't call him the "Wild Man" for nothing... the party took an ugly turn when John got a little too excited about his birthday presents and wound up dumping an entire extra large soda on my lap.

My soaked crotch was worth the good times... happy birthday, John!

Fatty-Fat Friday!

Clothing stores are lying to you: You're way fatter than you think. Eat a carrot.

How the Chinese pack playing cards

Next time you play some Texas Hold-Em, think about these guys who packed your cards into that little box. I look like an ass just trying to shuffle without dropping any...

How John Goodman lost all that weight

Hidden camera footage of his exercise routine:

Police blow up a suspicious toy pony

Everyone knows that Whisper Glenn Court in Orlando has been a terrorist hot spot for quite some time. So it's about time police sprung into action. I'm just glad they didn't overreact. I mean, what would a stuffed pony be doing near a school yard? Seems suspicious to me.